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here for 2012 OVERVIEW!
NEW MOVIES! JANUARY 17 - JANUARY 23, 2012 |
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THE IDES OF MARCH (dir: George Clooney, R) – When will
Hollywood realize that I do not care about politically-driven
dramas? I don't not vote so that I have to be subjected to handsome
actors portraying ugly politicians. Whatever, though, all those fat
cats needed to see was the line-up: George Clooney, Ryan Gosling,
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Paul Giamatti, Marisa Tomei, Jeffrey Wright
and Evan Rachel Wood. Cha-ching, Cha-ching, Cha-ching, Cha-ching,
Cha-ching, Cha-ching, Cha-ching. |
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ABDUCTION (dir: John Singleton, PG-13)
– When a movie's description is so vague that it could describe any
movie in its genre, it's probably going to be awesome. With a
tagline like, "Suspect everything. Trust no one," literally anything
can happen. Suspecting everything seems a little paranoid - unless
you suspect that this movie is awful. |
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BUCKY LARSON: BORN TO BE A STAR (dir:
Tom Brady, R) – Please bow your head and take a moment of silence
for the death of Adam Sandler's popularity. First JACK AND JILL and
now... this!? I would understand a film of this caliber to be for
kids, or idiots, but with an R rating it's no wonder this film not
only made no money, but was enjoyed by almost no one. The "Sand-man"
just proved something. I'm not sure what, but I'm sure it isn't
good. |
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TOAST (dir: S.J. Clarkson, Not Rated) – Check out the
sequel to "Billy Elliot" today. Only it isn't the sequel, it just
feels a lot like it. Switch a love for dancing with a love for
cooking, backed by awesome songs by Dusty Springfield and you have
TOAST. I hope the special features include a commentary track from
superstar chef Gordon Ramsay where he talks about how all the dishes
were burnt, under-cooked, raw, or well-seasoned. Unfortunately, Chef
Goldblum was unavailable for the making of this movie. |
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*DIRTY GIRL (dir: Abe Sylvia, R) – If
movies like JUNO or LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE pulled you in, but didn't
contain enough "Sexual Content including Graphic Nudity, and
language," then check out this quirky comedy about a girl who runs
from her reputation during the '80s. |
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COURAGEOUS (dir: Alex Kendrick, PG-13)
– It's safe to say that I love Dads. I love dads, dad stuff, dad
jokes, cool dads, humble dads, and even fathers. So when someone set
out to make a flick about dads being dads, and cops, I was all like,
"Man, this movie is all about dads!?" and then I didn't watch it.
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AGE OF HEROES (dir: Adrian Vitoria, Not Rated) – "Sean
Bean really knows how to make a hit." - Kent Eliassen. That's right,
Boromir is back and better than ever in this new installment of LORD
OF THE RINGS. Or, it's the prequel to GAME OF THRONES. Er, actually
it is just banking on the fact that you know and love those things
and will rent this WWII epic based on star-power alone. |
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^AURORA (dir: Cristi Puiu, Not Rated) –
I'm pretty sure the only country in the world producing good movies
right now is Romania. The director of THE DEATH OF MR. LAZARESCU
brings you this character study of an unstable man about to commit a
multiple murder. For a movie where nothing much happens for two and
a half of its three hour running time, the
anxiety level it produces is off the charts. |
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BOMBAY BEACH (dir: Alma Har'el, Not
Rated) – Three people from three different generations with three
different issues share a unique story about hope. It’s long-winded,
but Alma Ha’rel’s unique take on the documentary genre as a whole
can be fascinating. |
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COLD SWEAT (dir: Adrian Garcia Bogliano, Not Rated) –
It seems there's not a week that goes by without a brand new
Spanish-language horror movie showing up at our store. This one's
got a brilliant concept, though: The killer covers his nubile
victims in nitroglycerin so that they have to undress v-e-r-y
s-l-o-w-l-y to save themselves. |
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FILM SOCIALISME (dir: Jean-Luc Godard,
Not Rated) – This is the kind of art film that would be made fun of
in a Terry Zwigoff movie if an art student made it. But Godard made
it. Wait, what does this mean? What was that image? It’s kind of
pretty. It’s genius. |
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GANTZ II: PERFECT ANSWER (dir: Shinsuke
Sato, Not Rated) – Every popular comic book ("manga") in Japan gets
made into an anime series. Every popular anime series gets made into
a live-action movie. Every popular live-action anime adaptation gets
released on DVD in America, regardless of its incomprehensibility
to anyone unfamiliar with the source material. |
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KILLING BONO (dir: Nick Hamm, R) – Do you need another
reason to hate U2? How about this? These two cool bros are trying to
become the biggest rock and roll band in the world until their old
academy buddies (U2) become the biggest rock and roll band in the
world. And I thought Bono cared… |
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REDLINE (dir: Takeshi Koike, Not
Rated) – Here’s a cartoon that looks cool, guys. I have always, and
I mean always, tried to live my life a quarter mile at a time. And
that’s what this animated flick is all about. It’s too bad cartoons
can’t be documentaries 'cause this would be too real. |
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THURGOOD (dir: Michael Stevens, Not
Rated) – If you like biographies or plays, this DVD is for you. If
you like both, well you just hit the jackpot! THURGOOD is the life
story of Thurgood Marshall, civil rights advocate and Supreme Court
judge. Filmed in front of a live audience at the Kennedy Center's
Eisenhower Theater, written by an award-winning screenwriter and
starring an award-winning Morpheus (a.k.a. Laurence Fishburne), it's
safe to say the people involved in this film have won some awards
before. |
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UNDOCUMENTED (dir: Chris Peckover, Not
Rated) – I guess this fake documentary is sort of like the opposite
of a home-invasion flick. On the other hand, maybe you might
sympathize with this movie's sadistic anti-immigration extremists who capture and torture Mexicans who are crossing over into
the US illegally. |
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= KURT'S PICK OF THE WEEK!
^
= BART'S PICK OF THE WEEK! |
