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click
here for the previous week's New Movies
click
here for 2010 OVERVIEW!
NEW
MOVIES! MARCH 2 - MARCH 8, 2010
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BITCH SLAP (dir: Rick Jacobson, Unrated) – Maybe if Quentin Tarantino had masterminded this exploitation flick it would've had something to offer. As it stands, the best it's got are cameos from Lucy Lawless and Kevin Sorbo. Great title though. |
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BLISS (dir: Abdullah Oguz, Not Rated) – Apparently in some parts of Turkey if you dishonor your family by getting raped you then get to be stoned. Stoned in the biblical sense, not in the Cheech & Chong sense. |
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BOLLYWOOD HERO (dir: Bill Bennett, Not Rated) – Chris Kattan plays a Dutch actor who heads to India to star in one of their fancy musicals. But this movie itself is one of those fancy musicals. And in strict accordance with the rules of Bollywood, this is 3 hours long. |
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DOUBLE IDENTITY (dir: Dennis Dimster, R) – Val Kilmer has officially taken over Cuba Gooding Jr.'s title of fastest working man in show business. This is about the 10th straight-to- DVD action junkfest he's churned out in the last year. |
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ELEVEN MINUTES (dir: Michael Selditch / Robert Tate, R) – Oh, cool. I thought there was no possible way I'd ever learn anything more about Jay McCarroll from PROJECT: RUNWAY until this documentary came along. |
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AN ENGLISHMAN IN NEW YORK (dir: Richard Laxton, Not Rated) – 35 years after THE NAKED CIVIL SERVANT, John Hurt is back doing what he does
best - pretending to be Quentin Crisp. |
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^GENTLEMEN BRONCOS (dir: Jared Hess, PG-13) – Here's another offbeat comedy from the creators of NAPOLEON DYNAMITE, and this time one of the FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS guys plays a writer who steals the idea for his next fantasy novel from a teenager. |
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$9.99 (dir: Tatia Rosenthal, R) – This stop-motion animated film from Australia follows the goings- on at a Sydney apartment complex and features native Australians Geoffrey Rush and Anthony LaPaglia using their real accents. |
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PONYO (dir: Hayao Miyazaki, G) – Miyazaki's back, but the hipsters think it's a little too juvenile. It's undoubtedly beautiful but it's just THE LITTLE MERMAID with a goldfish. |
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THE PRIVATE LIVES OF PIPPA LEE (dir: Rebecca Miller, R) – Now that Robin Wright ditched that deadbeat Sean Penn she's back with one of the best roles of her underrated career. She plays a woman having a quiet breakdown after her kids have left and she realizes her husband is Alan Arkin and he's ridiculously older than her. |
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SWEDISH AUTO (dir: Derek Sieg, Not Rated) – Lukas Haas and January Jones play small town loveable loser types in this inoffensive indie. |
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THREE BLIND MICE (dir: Matthew Newton, Not Rated) – In this dark comedy, three Australian Navy men tear up Sydney for one last night before being shipped of to the Middle East to fight in one war or another. |
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*2012 (dir: Roland Emmerich, PG-13) – Dudes. Haiti? Chile? Crazy storms all over the world? That Glenn Beck guy and his stupid face? I don't know much about the Mayan version of events but my doom-o-meter is going OFF. |
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THE VICIOUS KIND (dir: Lee Toland Krieger, R) – Adam Scott, the cool guy from STEP-BROTHERS and EASTBOUND & DOWN, plays a guy with a beard who's fighting with his brother and his
father over some girl who used to be on the WB. |
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= GREG's pick of the week! ^ = Bart's
pick of the week! |
