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click
here for the previous week's New Movies
click
here for 2010 OVERVIEW!
NEW
MOVIES! MAY 25 - MAY 31, 2010
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DEAR JOHN (dir: Lasse
Hallstrom, PG-13) – I’m not sure if Channing Tatum has emotions, but the fact that he grew out his hair another half inch is as good a sign as any that he’s ready to use them. Unless, of course, he has “Nicolas Cage Syndrome,” a disease in which the length of hair has a direct correlation with amount of craziness that shoots out of one’s face. I’ll be rooting for the latter. |
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^THE GIRL ON THE TRAIN (dir: Andre
Techine, Not Rated) – This movie looks really, really French. If you’re into that, you’ll probably enjoy this movie. If you cringe when someone says, “French film,” you’re not gonna enjoy this. Let’s be real people. |
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MYSTERY TEAM (dir: Dan
Eckman, R) – Popular for their online sketch-comedy shorts, the Derrick Comedy team has now released their independently-produced debut feature about former kid detectives who are now eighteen get involved with solving a homicide. Donald Glover (one of the stars/writers) has written for
30 ROCK and has a part on the show COMMUNITY. I really want to live out my dreams through him, so I hope this movie doesn’t blow. |
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OWL AND THE SPARROW (dir: Stephane
Gauger, PG) – If
your… feathers… get rustled by fanatic acclaim like, “Sweet
natured,” check out this tale about how a flight attendant, a zookeeper, and “a young, flower-selling runaway” meet and love gushes out of their Saigon plumage. There are no euphemisms in this review, Feather-People. |
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PLAY THE GAME (dir: Marc
Fienberg, PG-13) – Andy Griffith and Doris Roberts (happiness jet pack!) headline this film about teaching your widower grandpa some pimp-ways but later realizing that your young, un-Griffith-like pimp-ways are not the way to get busy in the real way: the heart way. Basically, if your pimp-ways are wack and you need someone like Andy Griffith to show you how to get it done, this movie is for you. Recap: Griffith is a pimp. |
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#THE ROAD (dir: John
Hillcoat, R) – In the literally tumultuous sea of apocalyptic and post-apocalyptic film, Viggo Mortensen’s portrayal of a father trying to protect his young son from the barren, violent America that has emerged after a mysterious catastrophe promises to be the most gravelly-voiced
apoca-performance of the year. Gravel makes roads! |
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SPRING 1941 (dir: Uri
Barbash, R) – I’m gonna go ahead and say that if you were in Poland in 1941 and Jewish, going back thirty years later is probably going to bring up some bad memories. Being a world famous cellist is just going to make it worse; it’s not like you come back from THAT trip down Memory Lane (Nazi-infested Poland) and crank out “Happy Birthday” – do you know what I am saying? |
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TELL TALE (dir: Michael
Cuesta, R) – A Ridley and Tony Scott produced revision of Edgar Allen Poe’s “The Tell-Tale Heart” that promises to be as grossly unnecessary as Tony’s remake of THE TAKING OF PELHAM 1 2 3. Brian Cox is in TELL TALE though. That’s pretty neat I guess. |
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TRUE BLOOD: SEASON 2 (dir: Alan Ball, Not Rated) – I’ve never seen this show, but I hear it’s got lots of lusty vampires. I guess the little girl from FLY AWAY HOME takes off her shirt a lot in this show, probably in conjunction with blood drinking . If you like topless, blood-thirsty,
former duck-loving little girls, season 2 of TRUE BLOOD is here for
yooooooouuuu!!! |
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= THOM's PICK OF THE week! ^ = Bart's
pick of the week! |